Selfish
by Lyralocke
Summary: Kataang, oneshot. Katara just wants Aang to be selfish for once.


_This is just another idea I had. It's a little weird... I don't know. It just kind of walked into my head or something._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar  
_

* * *

Life in the Fire Nation wasn't so horrible, Aang reasoned to himself as he moved quietly between the rooms of their small home in the big city. The setup was actually quite nice. It was kind of small, but there were two bedrooms, and the windows ran all the way from floor to ceiling. Their home was on a hill, so they had a view of a good portion of the city. It was a great spot.

Unfortunately, the Fire Nation was very different from the rest of the world. Even with their disguises, and Aang's new hair, it was all they could do to keep from being discovered. Sokka, Toph, Katara, and Aang took turns patrolling their neighborhood day and night, watching out for people they saw more than once in case they were bounty hunters, spies, or soldiers scoping out their location. So far, no such danger had arisen, but Sokka and Toph were out on patrol all the same, leaving Aang and Katara alone in their quiet little home.

And while Aang was a little nervous about this arrangement, Katara seemed wholly unaffected. In fact, she hadn't done or said anything all day. Every time Aang walked into the room, she was in the same position: sitting cross-legged on the floor, gazing through the window out over the city. He couldn't ask Sokka and Toph what was wrong with her. He sighed. Apparently it was up to him.

"Katara?"

The young waterbender glanced over at him as he sat down beside her on the floor. She didn't smile, as she usually did when he joined her. In fact, she seemed to be avoiding looking at him. Aang wasn't used to this at all.

"Uh... Katara? Are you okay?" he asked carefully, his eyes not leaving her though she stared determinedly out the window.

Katara was silent for some time. She sighed and looked at the floor. "…Sort of…"

"What's wrong?" he asked immediately.

She glanced at him again. "I can't tell you," she whispered, drawing her knees up to her chin and returning her gaze to the window.

Aang tilted his head a little, a slightly confused smile playing on his lips. She was acting very, very strange. "Come on, Katara. You can tell me anything," he was whispering too now, though he wasn't sure why.

"I… well…" she started slowly, looking at him again. The look on her face surprised him. She was serious about this. She really didn't feel like she could tell him. "Ah… it's nothing…"

Even though she was acting so strange, she was still stubborn. Aang knew better than to argue with her. He sighed and got to his feet, turning to walk away. But before he could move a step, Katara's hands were tight on his wrist.

"I don't want you to go," she blurted, looking as though she was surprised at what she had just done.

"Uh… okay," Aang said, bewildered. He sat back down beside her. "I guess I'll stay then."

"No… I mean… I don't want you to go…" she began quietly, turning away from him again and releasing his wrist. "And… fight the Fire Lord…"

That was the absolute last thing Aang had ever expected Katara to say to him. He was visibly stunned, eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

"Wait… what?" was all he managed to choke out.

Katara bit her lip and closed her eyes, anguish visible in her every move. It was killing her to say this.

"Let's go," she whispered desperately, eyes shining with tears as she stared imploringly at him. "You and me. Let's take Appa and fly away from here."

"Katara…" Aang began, still in utter shock as she continued.

"We'll go somewhere the Fire Nation can't get to us and… we'll just live there for the rest of our lives, together," she was still whispering, pausing only to take a harsh, gasping breath every so often as she tried not to cry. It sounded as though every word was causing her physical pain, and Aang felt entirely powerless to help her.

"I… I don't understand…" Aang said slowly. "I have to fight him. I'm the only one who can. I have to, for everyone."

Katara looked at him sadly, a few rare tears slipping down her cheeks. "I just… I don't want to spend a day without you for the rest of my life," she said quietly. His eyes widened, and he couldn't help but feel rather pleased by her admittance. She looked down again. "I have faith in you, Aang. I know you can defeat him. I _know_ you can."

Her voice had become rather husky, and Aang realized with a great deal of surprise that she was really, truly, crying. He had never seen Katara really cry before. The worst of it was that she was crying for _him_.

"But…" she trailed off. "The Fire Lord… he… there's always a chance that… I won't ever see you again."

"Yeah… I know…" Aang sighed.

"I'm not okay with that, Aang!" she burst out, finally speaking above a whisper and making Aang jump. "I just…" she trailed off again, reaching forward compulsively and brushing her fingers through his shaggy black hair. Though he was startled, he couldn't help but notice how good it felt. "I just want you to be selfish for once."

Aang stared at her. She was biting her lip again, watching him warily.

"Selfish?" Aang repeated quietly.

"Yes," she was whispering again. "Do something you want just because you want to. Take something as your own and no one else's. Be indulgent, be impulsive."

"I uh… I'm a monk, we were raised not to be selfish," Aang muttered.

"I know, and you're the Avatar," Katara continued quietly, gaze softening slightly as she tilted her head. "Everything you do has to be for the world. But I want you to do something that's just for you, no one else."

Aang was silent for some time. There was certainly one thing he would do if he could be selfish. He would take Katara into his arms and hold onto her until the day he died. If he was lucky, that wouldn't be for a long time. But the way things were going, it would be a great deal sooner than he would like.

"Don't you want me, Aang?"

Aang thought for several seconds that his heart had stopped. He had clearly just died, because never in a million years would Katara say that to him, outside of his dreams.

"W…what?"

"If you're going to take something, so no one else can have it, don't you want it to be me?" she asked quietly.

"I… well…" Aang stammered. This was more like the Katara he knew, but he wasn't ready for it. "Yes."

He had barely gotten the word out when she threw her arms around his neck, pulling herself against him. He compulsively wrapped his arms around her waist, returning the embrace. He felt her fingers at the back of his neck, unconsciously running up into his hair. He tried to stay focused, but the feeling of her fingertips trailing over his scalp was very distracting.

He could feel her breathing heavily, sounding again as though she was trying not to cry.

"Aang, I'm sorry," she gasped. "I know we can't just leave… but… I wish we could."

"So do I," he said honestly. He was relieved she was no longer asking him to leave with her. A few more times, and he would have.

"When we started out on this journey, all that mattered was stopping the war," she whispered. "But now… I just want you."

"Katara…"

"It's not fair, Aang," her voice was husky again. She was crying. "It's not fair that you have to fight him alone."

"I know…"

"When this is all over… when you beat him… what will we do?" she asked at length as her crying quieted.

"We'll take Appa and fly away from here," he said quietly, a smile in his voice. "You and me."

A laugh escaped her and she sniffed, pulling away from him and wiping her eyes on the back of her hand.

"Sorry…" she muttered, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to get all hysterical on you like that."

"It's okay… I know how you feel," Aang admitted with a nervous laugh.

She smiled warmly at him and leaned forward, placing a lingering kiss on his cheek. He smiled at her, and she moved toward him again. This time, her lips met his instead of his cheek.

"Just don't die, okay?" she muttered into his mouth. He pulled his lips from hers, but stayed close, smiling.

"I'll definitely try not to."

* * *

_That part where Katara is like "If you're going to take something, take me!" Yeah, that ended up sounding like she was like... asking for sex. She wasn't. It just sounded like it, haha._


End file.
